My Ways Are Not Thy Ways

Jack and Sue Kapp  (mom and dad).  Dad
passed away in March of 2007.  Mom is still
around teaching us the Gospel through her
selfless acts of service to any who need her.

(taken from the writings of Jack R. Kapp)

As a result of a severe heart attack, Jack required open heart surgery at the age of 47 where he had multiple bypasses put in place to correct the blockages that had caused his heart attack.  This was at a time when open heart surgery was really the only option available for Jack as angioplasty was in its infancy.

In a matter of hours, the surgery was performed and Jack was back in his hospital room ready to start the long process of recovery and rehab that awaited him.  He knew the process would be fairly lengthy to get back to doing the things he enjoyed in life (he was an avid golfer and sports enthusiast) and after many months of painful recovery and rehab, he was finally able to resume most if not all of the activities he had enjoyed prior to the heart attack.

Jack experienced good health for several more years then again, another heart attack.  By his time however, the angioplasty procedure had made serious advances and there was the possibility maybe even probability that open-heart surgery would not be required but a less invasive procedure to place a stent could possibly correct the blockage and he would have minimal recovery compared to his first surgery.

Jack desperately wanted to avoid open heart surgery and the lengthy painful process of rehab and recovery.  A family and ward fast was initiated in his behalf and many prayers and a priesthood blessing we're given.  

Jack had always been a faithful servant of the Lord having been raised in the Gospel.  He had served as Bishop, as a counselor in the Stake presidency, as a faithful home teacher and Gospel doctrine instructor.  Jack had an unwavering testimony and now desired to “cash in” on his faithfulness and in heart-felt supplication he requested the blessing he sought from the Lord.

The next day they took Jack into the Cath-lab to perform the angioplasty procedure.  Jack was so happy that he was almost giddy, but after two hours in the Cath-lab trying to get the lead wire through the blockage, the cardiologist bent his head down and informed Jack that he just could not get through the blockade to place the stent.   The doctor then left the lab briefly to consult with other doctors but when he returned and gave it one more try, he still could not successfully accomplish the procedure.  

While the doctor was out of the lab the thought occurred to Jack that he needed to administer to the physician.   Here he was laying on the table, he didn’t know the doctor and didn’t even know if the doctor was LDS, but Jack thought to himself: "I'll be darned if I am going to go through another operation wondering if I had just had the faith to administer to this doctor everything would have been alright, so Jack summoned up all of his courage and asked: "Doctor, are you LDS?"  No, I'm Jewish came the answer.  Jack then told him: "Well you are going to have to indulge me a little, because I need to give you a priesthood blessing.” 

You could have heard a pin drop in that lab as all eyes were on the doctor.  Then bless his heart the doctor said: "What do you need me to do?"   Jack told him to bend his head down where he could place his hand on it - which he did and Jack offered a very short but fervent blessing stating that unless it was expressly against the will of the Lord, the procedure would be successful.  Then Jack told him: "Now go back and try again - hard".  You could sense the feeling of hope as this little Jewish doctor said: "I will, I will".

The doctor struggled for about another half hour using special tools along with all his knowledge from experience and then with sweat dripping from his face he bent down and said. "Jack, I am a very good doctor but I just can't get it.  I know what it means to you, but I just can't go any farther and risk punching a hole in your heart.”  Another open-heart surgery was now again the only viable option.

Needless to say, when they wheeled Jack back to the room, he was so disappointed and discouraged that he actually sobbed.  His wife also cried and those who had given him the beautiful priesthood blessing were greatly saddened and perplexed.

Jack was a bit scared, and confused, and bitterly disappointed and I think that it would be accurate to say that he might have just experienced a glimpse of what the Savior must have felt when he thought that the Lord had forsaken him in his hour of greatest need.

For many hours that day, he searched for the answer - thinking and reasoning and reading well into the night in the scriptures for the understanding that he now so needed.  As he did so, Jack came across two scriptures found in Isaiah and the D&C that were particularly meaningful to him.  Not so much for what they said as for the peace he felt in his soul when he read them. 

Jack said, “My soul was just ready to burst.  I felt the spirit so close to me and I wanted to sing and shout”.  Well, you just can't sing and shout in the hospital in the middle of the night so he decided to express his feelings by writing a poem. 

The words flew from his mind to the back of the meal menu for the next day.  When the poem was complete he read back the words.  They were simple, but he was comfortable with the knowledge that they were an expression to his Father in Heaven of the feelings of his heart … Jack now understood and was willing to place his trust in God’s infinite wisdom. 

Jack’s surgery and subsequent recovery was successful and complete and he went on to live many years serving the Lord and blessing the lives of many others.  He shared his experience often and his sister (JKP) set his words to music.  It is of course, one of my favorite songs and the message pertains to each of us at many different times throughout our lives.

I would like to share that poem with you (music can be found on iTunes as well as http://www.janicekappperry.com )

My Ways Are Not Thy Ways
Words by Jack R. Kapp

In faith, I came today on bended knee,

To ask a special blessing from thee, Lord,

I felt my plea was just and prayed in perfect trust,

Believing my petition must be heard.

But the blessing that I sought was not received.

In sorrow and despair I sadly bent.

Confusion filled my mind, and I felt that I must find

The reason why the blessing was not sent.

So I searched within the pages of the Sacred Book of Life,

And there I found the answer from One who is all wise.

My ways are not thy ways, my child,

And you must learn to put your trust in Me.

My way are not thy ways, my child,

And heaven’s ways are sometimes hard to see.

You pray for all things to be well, within your earthly veil,

But My view is of all eternity.

Dear Lord, help me to put my trust in thee,

And learn to follow where I cannot see.

I want to live by faith ‘til I behold thy face,

And then I’ll see that all was well with me.

Now thy redeeming love is all I need

To fill my soul with peace and hope today.

Please do with this, thy son, As Thou wouldst have it done,

Dear Father let it be in Thine own way.

For I searched within the pages of the sacred Book of Life

And there I found the answer from One who is all wise.

My ways are not thy ways, my child,

And you must learn to put your trust in Me.

My way are not thy ways, my child,

And heaven’s ways are sometimes hard to see.

You pray for all things to be well, within your earthly veil,

But My view is of all eternity.

My ways are not thy ways, my child.

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